Slipping Away...

It is hardest to remember to make time for ourselves.

Usually my only alone time during the day is when I am in the bathroom...and lately not even then as my daughter will bang relentlessly on the door until I let her in.

Any parent can probably agree that with children your time is limited because from the very beginning our kids demand everything from us. Whether they are younger or on the older side, there are always many activities pulling us in various directions. We go from around the clock feedings and diaper changes to soccer practices and then eventually to glorified chauffeur. Yes, it can be taxing to say the least.

I noticed that as the needs of my kids grew my own needs seemed to fall to the side. As much as I'd like to, I have never been one to lead a "balanced" life...I tend to go all or nothing with everything I do. This can be beneficial in some cases but also detrimental in others. When my son was born I found it extremely difficult to balance the challenges of motherhood with work and my own personal interests. Exercise fell to the side, dates with my husband were few and far between, and girl time with friends was completely obsolete. It was definitely an adjustment, and one I did not always make very well because even though I was gaining a new member into my life I felt like I was slowly losing me.

It happens...and it is scary.

I knew I had to make some changes so slowly I started adding the missing pieces back into my life. I dusted off my yoga mat and workout shoes and decided that losing that hour of sleep was worth it for the sanity I gained from the exercise. My husband and I put date night on the calendar and banned "kid" talk from the entire evening...and remembered why we liked each other to begin with. Girl time was slipped in here and there and was absolutely wonderful.

I was back.

It's ironic, but I found that when I sacrificed some of the limited time for ME I was a better parent, wife and friend. Now when I am about to go out for an evening my son is notorious for questioning me endlessly on WHY he can't join me. I kindly tell him that mommy needs time for herself and he looks at me with his huge brown eyes and asks, "But why Mommy???"

My response to that is always, "Because Mommy loves you..."

I know myself well enough to understand that I need to have something that is solely mine in order to be whole. As much as I adore my children I also enjoy working...I like to have some adult time with friends...and I know that I cannot be a "present" parent if these things are missing.

So today I am thankful for all the stolen moments where I get to be me. My hope is that I am modeling a healthy habit for my kids by showing them that it is not only okay to take time for yourself, but that it is necessary practice in life.

Even if it means locking the door and ignoring all the raging protests from the other side...